Here is the grade/s and the professor's analysis of my paper. I am in a bad mood!! lol Now I am putting this out there for the world to view. :) She is a really really tough grader btw.
Tiffany George “Tourism and Commoditization: A Comparison of Two Ethnographies”
B+/A-
Generally through comparison of the two ethnographies. Good idea to examine the effects of commoditization on race and gender. Discussion of race is relevant and to the point. The addition of a brief explanation of gender is necessary but not sufficient, as the definition is not complete or correct: gender is not just about relationships that men and women have and the sexual division labor. Gender is an idea/ideal, about “masculinity” and “femininity,” in contrast to “real” men and women. Both components – the ideals of masculinity vs. femininity, as well as how this affects men and women -- comprise the study of gender. It was good to do a point by point comparison, but this could have been shortened. Minor writing problems. Title is weak (say something more interesting after the colon). The paper would have benefited from one more revision/edit. Good job on your first grad paper.
2 comments:
That is a very high mark for a grad paper. The marking scale is categorically higher than for undergrad papers. A paper worth an A should be publishable with few if any revisions.
Her critique seems reasonable and she is being encouraging.
Sorry to "side with the prof" but I think you are being overly hard on yourself and her.
Oh! I am blaming myself. Not her. It was me I was disappointed in. :) I am over that now. :)
It's cool! I never had much education on gender so that part was a bit challenging.
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